I am borderline-unemployable. Work ethic is an utterly foreign concept to me. My dedication to my own unprofitable, doomed interests at the expense of my employer, or potential employers’ insignificant concerns is so all-encompassing, so voracious, it could single-handily shred the last remaining fibers of the American Dream. My job [...]
Do you think drunk people give off the same glow as pregnant chicks? 9 hours ago
I like to sing "Where In the World Is Carmen Sandiego?" to myself while searching for which international porn star to rub one out to. 11 hours ago
Need to invent a new winky icon for "hint hint". The current one is all like "I want to put it in your butt, you know, if you're into that." 13 hours ago
"I didn't just dive into stinky pussy. I tested her dipstick style first. Good to go!" #friends13 hours ago