Posts in category Contributing Degenerates
High on Candy, Down on Love: Johnny ...
Swallowed, Snorted, or Inserted, these taste like shit
I’m sitting here alone on Valentines Day while my so-called friends go on dates. Some with their putrid excuses for girlfriends. Not even thirty and already sagging from the bones like wet clothes on rusty hangers. The others, out with the promiscuous goblins found in the dark, des [...]
Johnny Sweatpants’ first journe...
Our designated “food” critic Johnny Sweatpants submitted his first fast food nightmare for your guilty pleasure:
I am about to embark on a delectable dining experience of Viking proportions. In front of me, standing proud, is a week-old bucket of KFC fried chicken, extra crispy. Accompanying it on either side are twin bowls of KFC [...]
Confessions of a Drug Taker: “...
Our drug-addled, hyper-weirdo street consultant Jester Pepperbottom brings us the first installment in his sure-to-be-ongoing series of Gonzo journalism:
There comes a point in time for every serious drug taker where the binge turns on you. For me it was 3 weeks into a rakish marathon of alcohol, molly, cocaine, mushrooms, and ketamine. The [...]
America, Son! – In Response T...
Degenerate Nation welcomes its newest Contributor, the esteemed rapper and proud American, Skeet East (@SkeetEast), with his evisceration of the America-hating comedian and star of crappy movies, Chris Rock:
My nigga Lee Greenwood, poppin’ his collar for AMERICA
What up, Degenerates? I’m Skeet East. Hip-hop phenom, children̵ [...]
The Declaration of Dependence
When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one pathetic, irreversibly damaged “man” on the miserable cusp of his 30s, to dissolve the dream that consumed him throughout his absurdly inadequate, unprofitable, contemptible 20s, to render his artistic pursuits a crushing failure in their totality, and to return home [...]
DEL TACO-POCALYPSE!!!
The savages are out-breeding the sane, the civil. The base, berserk animal within us all, gnashing its ugly teeth, devouring our entrails, gnawing its way to the surface. We are stabbing each other over botched taco orders, y’all. Cutting the flesh, driving a serrated stake through the heart of conventional discourse.
Gabriel Villalb [...]
